This is it! The last week of this year’s Sizzlin’ Summer Challenge. You are nearing the finish line. The yellow school buses are back on the roads, plenty of first day of school photographs are popping up on Facebook and Instagram and Friday night football and soccer games are back.
Last weekend, rather than having the dirt road to myself for a long distance jog, I spotted several others running as I trudged up what I consider the killer mile. As I began passing a few of them, I figured out they were high school youth in training for the cross-country team. Much to my surprise when their coach (who was riding his bicycle) passed me he said, “Oh, for a minute I thought you were a member of the team.” At first I laughed it off but then I responded with a big “Thank you. That’s quite the compliment.” And that alone propelled me up to the top of that tough incline and kept me smiling for the rest of the day. I put a positive spin on it.
“When life gives you lemons, make lemonade” is an often used phrase that might provide some relief and guidance when life throws us a series of curve balls. Ever wonder where this phrase originated? I did. According to what I discovered, the writer, Elbert Hubbard, used it in a 1915 obituary to describe Marshall Pinckney Wilder, an actor, who put a positive spin on his life and his livelihood regardless of his disabilities.
Years later, the phrase reappeared in a poem entitled The Optimist in a 1940 edition of The Rotarian: “Life handed him a lemon, As life sometimes will do. His friends looked on in pity, Assuming he was through. They came upon him later, Reclining in the shade, In calm contentment, Drinking a glass of lemonade.
According to Dr. Barbara Fredrickson, a distinguished professor of psychology and author who has spent several years researching resiliency, resilient people are those who are “emotionally agile.” “That is, they don’t protect themselves from adversity or wallow in it. Instead they meet adversity with clear eyes, superbly attuned to the nuances of their ever-changing circumstances. Negative emotions rise up like an ocean wave and then dissolve.”
How do we become emotionally agile? Fredrickson says it’s possible to do so provided we train ourselves to stock up on positive emotions. Loving ourselves and accepting our shortcomings is key as is working with our community and social groups to face tough times together. That’s exactly what many communities did eight years ago when Tropical Storm Irene decimated many of Vermont’s homes, roads and villages.
While some tough and painful experiences are inevitable, our most negative experiences can be lightened by:1) recognizing that whatever has happened will pass 2) practicing self compassion and honoring the pain, 3) imaging ourselves connecting with others who may be suffering the same experience to build a sense of shared humanity and 4) by allowing the good and the bad to sit side by side so they can inform and influence each other planting the seeds of hope.
The Dalai Lama says that for every event in life there are many different angles from which to see the event. “While from one angle, you feel bad and sad, if you look from a different angle, you can see a particular event or painful situation providing new opportunities. When you look at the same event from a wider perspective your sense of worry and anxiety is reduced and thus you have greater joy and it leads to serenity and equanimity.”
Wow! There’s much to contemplate within these paragraphs. Now it’s time to put all of these recommendations into practice. We look forward to seeing how you put a positive spin on it this week. Frankly, I’m on my way to the kitchen to see if I can find a cold drink. All this talk about lemonade has made me thirsty.
Thanks for sharing a part of your summer with us.
See you on the PATH Ahead,
Shevonne, Gillian, Amy and Ashley